Waiting Tips – Saving Sex Until Marriage


1. Accept Christ and put him in charge of your whole life – heart, soul, mind, body.
2. Go over the creation story again in Genesis. Picture everything in your mind. The rain, the fog, birds in flight, fireflies. All the days coming together. Be absolutely certain that you give God credit for all the processes we do not see. Including sex – He made that too.
3. Realize that your attraction to the opposite sex is not unique, that it’s shared by every other human that ever lived (with a few rare exceptions). So yes, the boy sitting next to you thinks she’s hot too. Relatively speaking, skin is cheap.
4. Understand that sex is not dirty. God created it. So it must be good. The human race would not have survived without it. Realize that God could have created our reproduction by other means. In other words, the stork could really be delivering all babies.
5. The design of our bodies goes beyond genius. You have to admit that God knew a lot about multitasking before we did.
6. If it makes you uncomfortable, you probably shouldn’t do it.
7. The topic of sex needs to be discussed early in the relationship, like the second date. It doesn’t have to be an abrupt “so, have you had sex?” You can cleverly set up any number of discussion starters. “So what do you think about what the Patriots did to Tim Tebow?” “What do you think about Jase and Missy on Duck Dynasty? Did they wait too long?” “What do you think about the girl who auctioned off her virginity?”
8. Don’t put yourself in a situation where you will be tempted. For instance, if you’ve been invited to a party, but you don’t the people who are attending, just graciously decline.
9. Dress modestly, guys and girls. Clothes reveal how much value you place on your own body. And the value goes down the more you reveal. Girls – Most guys love a mystery. You are not going to have to show cleavage to get the attention of the right guy for you. Guys – There is nothing modest about wearing your pants around your knees. And if you have to wear your pants so tight that it leaves little to the imagination, you are telling the world that that’s your biggest asset. The truth is, they’re all on the same size. God gave us a brain to rise above the level of primal monkeys.
10. Get to know death and the nature of our mortality. When you visit a funeral time, take time to look at death in the face. Think about that person’s family. Now think about yourself. This may help put our temporary earthly bodies in perspective.
11. Defend each others virtue. Guys, I would say this responsibility falls mainly to you. If you see a nice girl getting bullied, you need to step up to the plate. Bring chivalry back.
12. Come to terms with the fact that you will be a minority, that you may not have many friends, that you may not be the most popular person in your class. Following the crowd does not lead to a life of virtue.
13. Be cognizant that the tiniest wisp of a butterfly’s wings can have eternal consequences tomorrow. For instance girls: If you are in your usual group of friends, don’t give the silent treatment to a guy that walks by and says hello. It may have taken him weeks to get up enough courage just to say hello. The chances of him trying again are slim to none. Just think, one split second in time, one turn of the head and a cold shoulder can say “no” to the person God intended for you to spend a lifetime with. Guys – This means stepping away from the pack sometimes.
14. Realize that we are all sensitive creatures. Guys – I’m not saying that should cry at the drop of a hat. But be in tune with your emotions. Don’t ignore them. God created them too. What may seem trivial to the world may actually be paramount in God’s eyes.
15. Forgot about “the talk.” You need to start a meaningful conversation with an older person you trust, someone who can share their life experiences with you, ideally someone who is also waiting, or a married couple who waited. It may not be your parents to initiate the conversation, especially if they didn’t wait. The conversation could be ongoing for months, years, etc. A mentor.
16. If you know something is wrong, you don’t have to ask anybody else.
17. Imagine the best looking person you know in your mind, maybe one you’ve dreamed about. Now imagine saying no when he/she knocks on your door and asks you if you want to have sex. Transfer that scenario to everyday interactions. Be prepared for anything.
18. Understand that saying no to sex before marriage is actually saying yes to God and your future spouse and lives together.
19. Understand that your normal and the ones who don’t wait are abnormal.
20. Put faith in the fact that God knows more than you. He built you and gave you an instruction book in the form of the Bible. No matter how out of step they may sound, there is a reason for all of his commandments.
21. Don’t keep your relationship secret. Christian friends can offer you support and advice.
22. Don’t be afraid to do a background check by whatever means necessary. If the person of interest is being honest with you, they shouldn’t have a problem with that.
23. Get to know their family. Find out about his/her parents’ history including how they met, how long they’ve been married, expectations, etc.
24. Have as much conversation as possible face to face. Not on social media, twitter, email, etc. Next best would be old fashioned telephone call. We are hard wired for direct communication.
25. Understand that sex makes you a different person, literally. It changes your body’s chemical composition and prepares you for lifetime bonding and child rearing (if that’s God’s plan).

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